Two weeks before we were suppose to be moved to Japan, we found out that I was denied medical clearance, which basically meant we could not go. Unless the issue regarding my health was resolved and I was healthy, it meant that we would lose the orders. The day we found out, I was devastated. Sean wasn't home and when I received the phone call. I remember hanging up the phone, and held my daughter as I sobbed. I was so heartbroken, and definitely thought the worst of the scenario. Even if we appealed the decision, we could still be denied again and that would definitely mean we were not going. I was so certain that the issue I was having wouldn't cost us the clearance before we submitted the paperwork that I had already made arrangements and plans for the move, I was even considering selling my car, thank goodness I didn't!
Appealing the denial would mean surgery for me which I did not want to do! Before we had even been denied clearance, I felt an impression from the spirit to call my doctor for a consult for surgery and to tell Sean to see if he could move his report no later than date. It is amazing how the Lord looks out for us, and guides our lives. I stubbornly made the appointment, thinking that sure I'll go in one more time and just explore my options of having surgery before moving or having surgery once we got to Japan and Ely was done breastfeeding. That was my biggest concern, I didn't want to miss out on breastfeeding my daughter and I was terrified my supply would dry up during my recovery period, even with pump and dump. Once we were denied clearance, I was able to use that appointment I made for the "consult" to actually be my pre-op appointment to get me ready for surgery. The whole process went very fast. I was not mentally prepared and didn't think I had enough breast milk stored up. It was not the way I saw that month going. 4 days after my surgery was suppose to be the day we left to go see family in Idaho before we went to Japan. As an avid planner, I was very frustrated with my situation. I wish now I had spent more time being grateful for the spiritual insight I was given than being bitter and angry that I had to receive surgery.
The blessings didn't stop with that little bit of help however! I was told that my incision during my surgery would be similar to a C-section and while they would try to do what needed to be done laproscopically, to prepare myself for the larger incision. I was told that I wouldn't even be able to see a doctor for my post- op to see if I was ok to travel at least 6 weeks after the surgery. When I woke up from surgery, I didn't have a big incision! I was sore, but I only had such small incisions that the doctor used fancy super glue to close them up because I received a laproscopic procedure. I was able to feed my daughter 24 hours after the surgery confidently because I hadn't taken narcotics or anything to heavy for the pain. When I went into my 2 week post -op appointment, my doctor told me she would do my appeal paperwork right then! I couldn't believe it. Yesterday April 15, was suppose to be my 6 week post- op, then we had potentially 2-3 weeks worth of waiting to see if we had the clearance. For this, I am extremely grateful that we found out today.
In writing so far, I've been fairly positive, mostly because I am so ecstatic that the news we received today was good. Up until today my attitude has not been so great. After we turned in our paperwork 3 weeks ago, and the recovery period before that, I have been so anxious and stressed. I apologize to any human who came in contact with my during that time if I was short with then or was in general a Debbie Downer. I do not take trials gracefully, and I am sure I was suppose to learn a lot of things from this experience. I found it incredibly ironic during this time, it was my turn to teach the visiting teaching message for March. I'm going to place that right here
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The Attributes of Jesus Christ: Long-suffering and Patient
This is part of a series of Visiting Teaching Messages featuring attributes of the Savior.
Patience is often thought of as a quiet, passive trait, but as President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, Second Counselor in the First Presidency, said, “Patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something … even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!”
In our premortal life, our Heavenly Father prepared a plan for us—His spirit children—and we shouted for joy at the opportunity to come to earth (see Job 38:7). As we choose to align our will with His during our earthly life, He “will make an instrument of [us] in [His] hands unto the salvation of many souls” (Alma 17:11).
President Uchtdorf continued, “Patience means accepting that which cannot be changed and facing it with courage, grace, and faith. It means being ‘willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon [us], even as a child doth submit to his father’ [Mosiah 3:19]. Ultimately, patience means being ‘firm and steadfast, and immovable in keeping the commandments of the Lord’ [1 Nephi 2:10] every hour of every day, even when it is hard to do so.”1
Additional Scriptures
From the Scriptures
The scriptures tell us that in our earthly life, we should “be patient in afflictions, for [we shall] have many.” God then gives us this comforting promise, “Endure them, for, lo, I am with thee, even unto the end of thy days” (D&C 24:8).
The following Bible story is an example of patience and faith.
“And a woman having an issue of blood twelve years … touched the border of [Christ’s] garment: and immediately her issue of blood stanched [stopped].
“And Jesus said, … Somebody hath touched me: for I perceive that virtue is gone out of me.
“And when the woman saw that she was not hid, she came trembling, and falling down before him, she declared unto him before all the people for what cause she had touched him, and how she was healed immediately.
“And he said unto her, Daughter, be of good comfort: thy faith hath made thee whole; go in peace” (Luke 8:43–48).
Like her, we can find blessings and comfort, and even healing, as we reach out to Jesus Christ—whose Atonement can heal us.
Consider This
From the account in Luke 8, how was this woman’s years of patience and then her faith in Jesus Christ rewarded? "
The link to the actual website.:The Attributes of Jesus Christ: Patience and Long suffering
I taught this lesson at least twice, and received it in my own home once. I was at a point where I told Sean that I didn't even care if we went to Japan anymore, that I've given up hope and I didn't want to get excited to get my heart broken again. My visiting teacher gave me this lesson shortly after that, and she shared something with me that at first I had a hard time with, but I am so grateful for now, that patience is also not giving up hope. What? So now, not only do I have to endure this trial gracefully, full of faith and whatnot, but I have to have hope as well? I. Am. Not. Patient. I am one of the worst of my generation that wants instant gratification quickly. This whole experience has really helped me learn patience & faith.
In my dramatic storytelling of my ordeal to my missionary sister Kassidy in the Phillipines, she sent me this little bit in her letter on faith
"It's amazing what it can do when we just DON'T DOUBT OR FEAR! like I have been really praying IN FAITH for Person A and Person B and that Heavenly Father will send someone to Person A's aid to help her and and she told me just now that she got a calling in church yesterday!!!!!!!! like WOOOOOOO! I know if i would have doubted, she might have not been prompted to accept or wouldn't of even gotten the opportunity! i have been seeing miracles like that allll over the last few days...like i've been reallly sick lately, but i got a blessing with complete faith that it would work but i also had faith to accept God's will (whether it be to be completely healed or just strengthened enough to bare it) and since i had faith, i feel loooooaaaddss better..and when i feel kinda sick to my tummy, i still have energy and motivation to do what i need to do.
For you, i pray specifically that if it be God's will for you and your family, that he will soften the hearts of those in charge and prompt them to let you be cleared. I think the faith part comes with being patient and willing to accept his will and timing for you! anyway. that's my sermon for today:) haha i love you and your little family so much. I actually had a dream i was at your house and i let converse and rocco out and had to chase them haha you were maddd..hehe anyway. MAHAL KITA...Tell sean and Ely MAHAL KO KAYO! <3
-Sister norman"
--- As I wipe tears away, Who is this woman that is my baby sister? I mean look at that goofball on the left with the goat! During a time in my life when I needed comfort and someone to tell me this, I never imagined she would be so learned, and understanding of the things that are truly important in this world such as faith!
It has required so much faith to get through this, to not give up and fight for the appeal. We have prayed every single day for this and I am so grateful that our prayers were heard! I'm sure we have more hurdles to jump over, but I am so glad we are past this one!
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